It’s a Small World

“Gentleman and lady“, dramatically announces the woman at the Hertz Rental desk in Athens International Airport, “I am about to give you the papers. Which car would you like? I have a,” and here she proceeds to list of a stream of Dacia’s, Renaults, and other foreign somethings that we cannot visualize. No matter, we have done our research and know we want a Duster. A Duster will give us just enough room that 4 or 5 adults can actually fit in it, and take their luggage along. (If it’s with them in Greece, that is).

“We don’t have a Duster”, we are cheerfully informed, and so agree to the next car that is “in the same category and maybe a little better”. Ok. She digs in a drawer, pulls out a set of keys with a wadded up paper stuffed through the key ring, unfurls the paper, flattening it as much as possible on the counter and fills out the details of the contract with a flourish. When she is finished, she wads it back up, sticks it back through the ring and hands over the keys.

With more cheerful words we’re pointed in the direction of the lot and told to talk with her colleagues and we’re free to go!

After several wrong turns we find the lot and the promised big car sitting in space 185. Wait, this is most certainly not a big car. This is a compact, yellow wonder. We try to unlock it, but the fob doesn’t work. Well, that’s overcome-able, we check in the boot and notice the carpeting on the floor dips down into a spare tire shaped hole. We raise the carpet and are greeted with a hollow space. Hmm. Also fine probably. But then we crawl into the back seat and its knees to the chest. Nothing doing. No one in their right mind could ride back there unless it was a full scale emergency or a group of 16 year olds. We hope we’ll encounter neither.

Heath conferred and conferred with the colleagues, walked the lot and looked for something, anything, bigger. There were one or two but they were “in a different category” Eventually we found something that had a few more inches of space and resigned ourselves to a cozy ride. Finally, it is what it is. Our luggage will probably fit and we should be able to all somehow wedge our feet down onto the floor. Also, it’s just for a couple of days. We can be sure and get something bigger when Darwin’s come.

Several days later finds us at the Budget Rental Counter, same Athens airport. We have gone with Budget instead of Hertz this time, because we already know Hertz only has teensy vehicles, and Budget has a better cancellation policy. Once again we have specified a big car, and once again we hear the words “Oh, we don’t have that car. I have something in the same category I can offer”. Great. Here goes round 2. But it’s Budget. Surely we can’t have the same problem twice.

Surely we can. Once again we strolled around the cars, sat in back seats, spoke to colleagues and in general were cheerfully refused any large vehicle requests. As we were waiting on Darwin’s anyway, we took our sweet time and even tried to go back in and upgrade to the next category. They could offer us that, oh yes, but to do it today would be €500. Gulp. Never mind. Maybe a little squishing will be ok. Meanwhile I was visiting with another American couple who were trying to find a car big enough to put a mobility scooter in the back. They’d been at it for hours, but were still in good spirits. When in Greece, do as the Greeks their attitude said, and I was very proud of them.

About the time Darwin’s got loose we were finishing up with the paperwork on a Renault who’s only recommendation was the fact that as long as Heath had the key fob in his pocket the car would unlock when he got close to it. For all you women with me who get weary of waiting on that welcome clunking noise while standing and twiddling next to the passenger door, this is a happy surprise!

As Darwin’s also were without their bags, we didn’t have to worry about luggage room at the moment, so we happily piled in and rolled off, the center person in the back lulled by the rhythmic clunk of the side people’s head on the ceiling and door…

Turkey. In Turkey we would do it right. Get something roomy. We will try Europcar for something different. A very nice man checked us in at the counter, allowed 2 drivers with no extra charge and told us to “go left, turn at the waterfall, and then follow the yellow trail all the way.” To this day I’m not betting even a dime there is a waterfall there, cause we certainly never found anything like it, but we did eventually end up at the rental car lot and were presented with our bona fide van. It may look like a cargo van, it may have metal grating behind the back seat, and it certainly doesn’t have anything snazzy like car play, but it has room! And, last but not least, a spare tire. Kim and I could store piles of things on that bolt upright back seat and still sit comfortably! The grate made it feel like we had a dog kennel behind us, and we got rather friendly with our imaginary German Shepherd. It was almost frightening how real he seemed. (Yoiks, the dog had to really brace around that corner!)

We knew we had one last kick at the rental car cat when we returned to Greece for the last leg of the journey. Once again we would be five adults, and once again we had quite a few hours to drive, this time to the Lefkada Marina from the airport. Darwin’s were going to rent their own ride as our ways were parting, and we joked that they’d probably get a bigger rig than us in spite of our best endeavors.

Sixt was our rental agent of choice this time. Sixt seemed to have more options. Sixt would not disappoint.

It started same same. Cheerful agent, crumpled papers, all done but the key handing when we heard the fateful words “we don’t have that car, but”.

Resignation. Rip off. Sadness. Submission.

Colleague assured us with great conviction that we would never have fit in the car we had initially chosen. “NO! You will enjoy this much better!, probably”. I heard the probably and chuckled. It was a good disclaimer. He needed to add it, cause when I saw the little black car roll up, it was much worse than I could have even imagined. We could have fought and searched and muddled our way through the same old process, but frankly we were tired. Tired of a million decisions and changes and adaptations and derailments, so we rolled with it.

“I feel like a total fool rolling up in this tiny car to pick up our crowd” Heath said, but I assured him they really wouldn’t mind the dreadful experience in retrospect for sure. It would make a good story.

We had a day on Corfu where we wanted wheels and we took what we got. No fussing. It was old, small, dirty and the AC button was glued down. No worries, the windows cranked down and the rear drivers side one made a delightful squeal as it traveled up and down. Daidre took full advantage of it, continually checking things out closely as we passed by. To be fair the windows were so dirty you did need to roll them down to really see. Small pleasures and small cars. All is good.